Personally, I don’t dig the idea of sex with animals. Apparently there are those that do, though, since we have to have laws about it. However, in Florida it may be legal for those sort of sick bastards to have oral sex with animals as long as the animal is on the giving end.
The only reason this came up was that I came across this article. Apparently, Eric Antunes is a sick fucking bastard in Florida who is in trouble for child porn and sex with animals after images were found on his home computer and cell phone. I would think that convicting this freak and getting him away from the rest of us would be the end of it, but apparently not all of the images of him screwing with animals were prosecutable under Florida law.
Apparently, Florida law states that: “[a] person may not: (a) Knowingly engage in any sexual conduct or sexual contact with an animal.” Further, Florida law states that “’[s]exual contact’ means any contact, however slight, between the mouth, sex organ, or anus of a person and the sex organ or anus of an animal, or any penetration, however slight, of any part of the body of the person into the sex organ or anus of an animal, or any penetration of the sex organ or anus of the person into the mouth of the animal, for the purpose of sexual gratification or sexual arousal of the person. . . . ” According to lawyers interviewed in the article (god knows why people have thought about the legal aspects of such things), this indicates that contact between a human’s genitals and an animals mouth does not count as sexual contact under Florida law as long as the human’s genitals do not penetrate the animal’s mouth to any degree.
However, this apparently is not going to count for much with Eric Antunes. The article reports that the prosecutor’s office is pursuing the child porn charges and is choosing not to get mired down in figuring out whether getting oral sex from an animal counts as bestiality.
Frankly, as long as Antunes goes to jail for a long time, I think we’ll be okay (though I hope Florida lawmakers take it upon themselves to close this potential loophole in the statute). Either way, I plan to stay the hell out of Florida.