Damn the Moab Motel With The Waterslide

Damn the motel in Moab that has a waterslide. There, I said it. That motel has done nothing but bring curses and destruction upon mankind and I have finally put them in their place. They are damned now.

What am I so upset about? Well, my wife and I got to our motel in Moab for our trip this last weekend. Believe me, non-camping places in Moab over the labor day weekend aren’t easy to find…and they aren’t cheap. Ours was nice. It wasn’t anything spectacular (I still debate whether or not that bed was really a queen), but it was convenient, clean, and had a decent heated pool. However, as we stood there in the parking lot, my wife could only look at the motel across the street. Their pool had a waterslide.

Mind you, it was the crappiest waterslide I’d ever seen. It was only something like 15 feet tall and only had one turn. The waterslides in the kids area at Elitch Gardens are bigger. Still, despite the fact that it was the lamest waterslide ever, my wife mumbles: “I want a waterslide….”

Really? All this work to put this trip together and she wishes we’d gotten the motel across the street because they had a dinky little waterslide? If you know my wife, though, you won’t be surprised at this.

We didn’t even know whether or not their pool was heated (most of our swimming was at night when, believe me, it tended to get a bit chilly). Hell, we only swam twice for about a half hour each time (most of the time we were too tired after hiking or kayaking to swim). The motel across the street might not have even had any vacancies when we booked. Regardless, my wife wished we’d booked there instead.

Thus, I think I am justified in damning the motel in Moab with a waterslide. There was absolutely no reason to have one other than to make my wife wish she was staying there instead of where we were. For that, they are now damned.

About David S. Atkinson

David S. Atkinson enjoys typing about himself in the third person, although he does not generally enjoy speaking in such a fashion. However, he is concerned about the Kierkegaard quote "Once you label me you negate me." He worries that if he attempts to define himself he will, in fact, nullify his existence...
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