Issues Presented By Zombie Bees

I just saw an article titled: “First ‘zombie bees’ reported in Washington state.” Mind you, I didn’t READ the article. I just saw the headline and started wondering how zombie bees might complicate the usual zombie equation.

I mean, there are certainly questions right off the bat. For example, usually you are expected to turn into a zombie if you are bitten by a zombie. However, do bees even have teeth? If so, are they powerful enough to be able to access someone’s brain? If not, how would they get brains to survive? Would their sting turn someone to a zombie? If they sting someone, would they become alive again? I just don’t know enough about bees to be able to answer these questions. However, I know enough about zombies to be able to ask the questions.

Also, zombie bees could present some interesting problems for standard zombie apocalypse preparedness procedures. For example, obstacles. People in zombie films always board up windows, but zombie bees could fly through any holes they left. Running might still be an option because they might not fly very fast, but standard ways to slow down zombies would have to change entirely since zombie bees can fly.

Regardless, the biggest problem would be killing zombie bees. After all, do you know how hard a head shot would be for a head that small? Also, think about dismemberment. Think about how tiny the legs of bees are. Zombie bees, though they might not be as strong as human zombies, would certainly present problems for normal zombie killing strategies.

Admittedly, this is probably not what that article I mentioned is about. I’m sure it’s more about some virus/bacteria/fungus/parasite that is attacking bees, causing them to behave sluggishly and/or erratically, and then killing them. It is probably not about undead bees. Still, I think these are important points that need to be considered…whether or not the article had the foresight to raise them.

About David S. Atkinson

David S. Atkinson enjoys typing about himself in the third person, although he does not generally enjoy speaking in such a fashion. However, he is concerned about the Kierkegaard quote "Once you label me you negate me." He worries that if he attempts to define himself he will, in fact, nullify his existence...
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