Where Has All the Chop Suey Gone?

Somebody appears to have stolen all of the chop suey in Denver.  I suspect Carmen Sandiego.  It has to be her.  Who else can steal things like the pyramids, the Eiffel Tower, and the 16th century?

I suppose I should explain.  There appears to be virtually no chop suey to be had in Denver.  There are all kinds of restaurants.  Dim Sum.  Sushi.  Country side Japanese cuisine.  Thai.  Indian.  Moroccan.  Brazilian.  All that.  There are plenty of Chinese places.  However, none of them that I found so far serve chop suey.  there must be somewhere, but I haven’t found it yet.

Clearly someone has to have stolen the chop suey.  How else could I check so many Chinese restaurants in town and not find it?  I thought that it was a standard.  A fallback.  A certainty, at least at Cantonese style restaurants.

I picked up my penchant for Chinese food from my dad.  He adored the stuff when I was little and was always dragging us to one place or another (even one place in San Francisco’s China Town where nobody spoke English and all the little kids from in back came out to stare at us because they weren’t used to seeing white people).  Most of the places we hit were these old looking dives in Omaha.  Actual chop suey houses, or something reasonably akin to that.  Chu’s.  King Fongs.  Great old places like that.

Not that I always grokked Chinese when I was a kid.  I hated it at first, always getting items off the American menus.  That also had something to do with a severe MSG allergy.  Although, my worst MSG reaction was actually over a steak served up at Chu’s.  That one was so bad I went into hypothermic shock.  Still, eventually I liked Chinese and even came to crave it.  Like heroin.

Of course, Chu’s Chop Suey (actual name) is gone now.  It was owned by this really nice old guy and his wife.  He closed the place when she unfortunately passed on (may she rest in peace deservedly for all the great food I ate there).  It got bulldozed so bad to make way for redevelopment that I can’t even find the exact spot it once stood.

So anyway, why do all the Chinese places in Denver shun chop suey?  It’s good.  Sure, some have chow mein (or lo mein), but that’s gross.  I could always get egg foo young, or moo goo gai pan, or Mongolian chicken, or pork fried rice, or stuff like that- but I want chop suey.  I built up a need for that over the years (that and chicken subgum, which I can’t find either).  Now I can’t fill that need.

It just doesn’t make any sense and it saddens me.  If anybody knows who stole all the chop suey, please ask them to return it.  I would like some.  Maybe not tonight since my girlfriend is going to make pork chops, but soon.  Otherwise, please write the Chinese restaurants in Denver and ask them to end the chop suey boycott.  They are hurting us and themselves.

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About David S. Atkinson

David S. Atkinson enjoys typing about himself in the third person, although he does not generally enjoy speaking in such a fashion. However, he is concerned about the Kierkegaard quote "Once you label me you negate me." He worries that if he attempts to define himself he will, in fact, nullify his existence...
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3 Responses to Where Has All the Chop Suey Gone?

  1. Incidentally, the pork chops were delicious.

  2. Rob says:

    how could you go into hypothermic shock from a steak?

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