I Actually Had A Comeback

I actually had a witty comeback today. I don’t mean later either. It wasn’t long after the situation where the comeback was irrelevant. No, something happened today and I immediately came back with something witty. You have no idea how rare this is.

There’s a shoe shine guy down on the 16th street mall who tries to be funny, but can sometimes be kind of offensive. A friend turned down a shoeshine from him one time and the guy looked closer and responded that he hadn’t realized those were ‘brokeback mountain’ boots, obviously not needing a shine.

Yeah, nothing pulls in business like homophobia jokes.

Anyway, I walked by that shoeshine guy today. I admit, my shoes need shining. With all the trouble getting ready to move recently I misplaced my polish. I think I know where it is and will dig it out to fix my shoes soon, but haven’t yet. It’s been icky a lot recently so my shoes would just have gotten messed up anyway, meaning they’d still need to be shined.

Anyway anyway, I walked by that guy and he said: “Whew! If your shoes look like that I’d hate to see your underwear.”

I immediately snapped back: “I’d hate for you to see my underwear too.”

Okay, so it wasn’t that great a comeback. Still, it was a comeback and I thought of it on the spot, in time for use. All in all, I’m still proud of myself.

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About David S. Atkinson

David S. Atkinson enjoys typing about himself in the third person, although he does not generally enjoy speaking in such a fashion. However, he is concerned about the Kierkegaard quote "Once you label me you negate me." He worries that if he attempts to define himself he will, in fact, nullify his existence...
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