Other Things Kermit Elementary School Should Make Sure Aiden Steward Doesn’t Bring To School

You might not believe this, but people have actually been giving Kermit Elementary School in Texas flack for suspending Aiden Steward over bringing a toy Lord of the Rings ring to school. I mean, could they take a chance it wasn’t the real one? I don’t think so. In fact, I think Kermit should be watching out for Aiden to bring in these other things:

– A small silver sphere:

– A chalice (whether or not from the palace):

– A satchel:

– A thermal detonator:

A laser capable of emitting a beam of pure anti-matter (albeit rare, since most lasers emit light as opposed to anti-matter):

Can’t take any chances with this kid. He’s trouble.

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About David S. Atkinson

David S. Atkinson enjoys typing about himself in the third person, although he does not generally enjoy speaking in such a fashion. However, he is concerned about the Kierkegaard quote "Once you label me you negate me." He worries that if he attempts to define himself he will, in fact, nullify his existence...
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