Starbucks Decides To Name Pumpkin Spice Lattes Cinnamon/Nutmeg/Clove/Ginger Lattes To Not Offend Those Who Don’t Celebrate Halloween

Starbucks allegedly recently announced that they will be switching the name of their pumpkin spice latte in future to cinnamon/nutmeg/clove/ginger lattes in order to avoid offending people who do not celebrate Halloween. They reportedly stated that pumpkins are associated with Halloween and not everyone celebrates that holiday. People will still be able to enjoy the same flavored latte, but it will simply be called by the common ingredients of pumpkin spice instead of by the pumpkin spice latte moniker.

Cinnamon/nutmeg/clove/ginger lattes will taste the same.

It was widely believed that white women in yoga pants would riot over this news. However, that outrage has yet to be noticeable. It has been theorized that no one really cares about something so trivial after all.

News sources have supposedly told the public not to worry though. If outrage isn’t forthcoming shortly they reportedly stated that they would manufacture it themselves, so we’re all good.


About David S. Atkinson

David S. Atkinson enjoys typing about himself in the third person, although he does not generally enjoy speaking in such a fashion. However, he is concerned about the Kierkegaard quote "Once you label me you negate me." He worries that if he attempts to define himself he will, in fact, nullify his existence...
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