Tag Archives: charlie sheen

It’s Pretty Bad When Charlie Sheen Calls You Out On Lifestyle Choices

I admit it, I had to laugh when I heard that Charlie Sheen got mad and ripped Farrah Abraham a new one. Granted, he did it because he got mad that she leaked their private text messages to the world. … Continue reading

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Scarlett Johansson: Public Interest In Your Nude Photos Renews My Faith In Human Lechery

Scarlett Johansson, I have to thank you.  The sheer scale of the public interest in your nude pictures has revived my faith in the lechery of humankind.  I suppose I might have to explain. You see, at one point I … Continue reading

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We Need To Pressure The Australians To Buy Condoms For Koalas

I know everybody loves koalas, but apparently somebody has been loving them a bit too much.  According to this article, koala populations are down to 20% of what they once were.  The cause?  Apparently the biggest problem facing koalas is … Continue reading

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Okay, The Royal Wedding Is Over! Return Coverage to Charlie Sheen And Lindsay Lohan Already!

The Royal Wedding of Kate Middleton and Prince William is over!  Everybody can stop reporting on it now!  It’s done!  Finished!  Caput!  Over with!  There is no more need for endless news articles popping up on all the news sites … Continue reading

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Who Do So Many People Care About Prince William Marrying Kate Middleton?

I am stumped.  I really am.  I really do not understand why so many people are all excited about Prince William marrying Kate Middleton.  But they seem to be.  They really seem to be.  It’s as inexplicable as how Captain … Continue reading

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Stop Your Fucking Whining, Rebecca Black

Now, originally I might have had some sympathy for Rebecca Black.  Originally.  However, I don’t think I do anymore.  No, that isn’t because I actually listened to her song.  I did, but it really isn’t any worse than any of … Continue reading

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If You Commit A Crime, Please Take Your Urine With You

It is difficult enough to evade detection when committing a crime, one does not need to make evading detection even more difficult by leaving one’s urine at the scene.  I’m serious.  My girlfriend watches all kinds of forensic shows on … Continue reading

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Charlie Sheen: Meltdown Or Meltdown Like A Fox? Does He Need Emilio Estevez To Save Him?

The thought occurred to me, Charlie Sheen may really be having a meltdown, or he might be doing something might craftier.  Perhaps even a mixture of both.  I don’t think it is safe to assume one  way or another.  Despite … Continue reading

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Italo Calvino Provides A Solution To The Celebrity Problem

I think it is no secret that I am utterly sick of hearing about the downward spiraling lives of celebrities.  However, it did strike me as a little odd this morning when I realized that the perfect solution has already … Continue reading

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Emilio Estevez, Where Are You? Charlie Sheen Needs You.

After being bothered constantly with the most recent aspects of Charlie Sheen’s supposed meltdown, I keep thinking one thing.  Where the hell is Emilio Estevez?  Shouldn’t he be doing something here?  This is his brother after all (actually, I believe … Continue reading

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